Lately I've been feeling overly-anxious and upset. I'm not sure what brought this on, possible after a few weeks of being at home over Christmas and then having to settle back into student life once again started this. You would think I'd be used to it by now, after all it's my third year at university. It just never seems to get any easier, going back to uni always feels so scary - like it's my first day all over again.
I come back, and it all seems fine. But then one bad day ruins it, puts me back into the routine of hiding away. Of staying in my room, and hoping nobody asks why. I seem to feel ill quite a lot, I think my anxiety brings this feeling on. I become stressed out over the smallest things, something so minor that wouldn't affect anyone else has me worrying for an entire afternoon. I try and guess what people are thinking, I wonder if they know I'm hiding. I tell people 'I'm not feeling great tonight', and they accept it and hope I feel better soon.
The past week and a half has probably been one of the toughest, for the fact that I've started back at lectures again and avoiding being social pretty much everyday. I hate that, I know I'm being anti-social and yet I cannot stop myself. An accomplishment for me is to go downstairs and have a conversation, but that really should not be a thing.
